What is it that makes you feel alive?
We live in a time of abundance and of fear of lack. By holding on so tightly to so much, we close off the channels of the very abundance we seek. Giving freely not only nurtures an abundance of joy in yourself and in others, but builds faith that what you need will come. It is through giving, through the leap that the net appears. We perceive our potential, our inspiration, the great works of our life to be this finite thing. We live in a fear that perhaps we will never create something better than what we have, or that we will never create the great work we were meant to.
It simply is not true.
We must believe in a benevolent and abundant universe, that there is room here for us all and that the things we desire are but muscles to be exercised, and that our habits and intentions are to be tended to with devotion. The things I truly want, I have feared for a long time. I’m not even sure what it is that holds me back, lack of knowing the way? Feeling like I am not ready or deserve it? Fear of the entire process? Still feeling like a child in some ways? Part of me feels like I have to drag myself to do the things I know I want to, and another part of me feels like I am holding myself back from doing the things I want to. This strange tug of war with myself that leaves my sides rope burned and each part feeling exhausted from all the effort of going nowhere in particular.
I feel alive when I am creating. Be it the prop build, that is a slow going and often tedious yet cathartic process, or the shooting which is often more hurried and physically demanding, to the editing that can at times be more frustrating, but equally soothing in its own way. I love creating images. I feel alive when the sun is hitting my face while I’m on a walk and I remember for that moment to be present. Presence grants vitality, and is often something our autopilot nature switches off for so much of our day. It’s a funny thing, isn’t it? I feel alive when I am putting food on a plate that I have cooked for those I love and arranging it in a beautiful way, as it is mere moments away from bringing joy and nourishment. I feel alive when I’m in ponds and streams, when I am exploring pockets of nature I’ve never seen before, not knowing what’s around the next turn. I have a truly beautiful life and it deserves my utmost love, presence and that I not wimp out on the things I love. That which I am passionate about deserves me giving it a proper try to make work. I’m not ready to give up before I’ve really given it all I can. Your beautiful life deserves your passion too. I hope you take a moment to take a deep breath and appreciate the power of presence and the wonders this day has given you without expectation of return.